A South African’s Hilarious Take on Love Island SA, Filmed in Cape Town

South African expats watching the new winter series of the UK’s popular Love Island have been in hysterics over some of the things happening on the show… since it’s filmed in Cape Town, and as expats they have an insider’s knowledge! Juliet Searle from Irene in Pretoria, who is now living in West Sussex, penned the following…

I have watched a bit of #loveisland in South Africa. I have my own opinion on the show??? but I won’t go into that here. However, there have been some amusing moments, only South Africans would understand.

1) How do they forget the heat of astro grass under the raging SA sun? Some of them have learned the necessity of flipflops early on, some continue to dance across the fake grass like cats on a hot tin roof. #cheatthefootheat #weallknowtheimpactofahotplasticseat #avoidtheblisterkoeksister #youonlytouchahotsteeringwheellockonce

2) How do they survive dating scenes in full sun, without sunnies? I mean I can feel the sweat dripping down my back and down my bottom from here. Never mind the awful squinting face one has to do to actually see in full South African sun. #greeneyessquintinvolsonskyn

3) There is no way that boerewors (“longest sausage I have ever seen”) survived being placed on full flames over the fire. #noonelikescharredboerie. I laughed like mad when they were pretending the smoke from the fire (on the windiest night ever) was romantic. I was half expecting them to try the fingers in a circle trick.? #weallknowthechokingcoughfromfiresmoke

4) Why don’t they get rusks for breakfast? #jissieeksmaakrusks

5) Where are the bottles of Peaceful Sleep? I know what that bedroom actually smells like and the smell of a Peaceful Sleep sprayed body is a wonderful contraceptive. Clearly not in there! #tabbardisabodycondom

6) They should be rewarded with a few lime milkshakes, cream soda floats and packets of niknaks/flings. #canyoutellwhatimissmost#howmanyflingscanyoufitinyourmouth

7) A hadeda/vuvuzela wake up call every morning would be most entertaining. They then could do some P.T with one of those strict Army Ooms from the veldschools. Put those preened, gym bodies to the test. “Gee vir my 100 opstoots!” It would be much more entertaining than those layabout “influencers” lolling on day beds, fighting the South Easter whilst asking for the 75th time, “So what is your type?”. #avuvuzelawakeupcallwouldbeappropriate
#bringonthesweetsongofthehadedas

8) Where are the pool noodles and kreepy crawly? Is there actually an SA pool that does not have a few bobbing about? #weonlyswimwhendadtakesthecreepyout

9) I can’t believe that they don’t swim more. They must be vrekking in that heat. A random sprinkler firing at them from the garden beds would be huge entertainment and actually quite real. #40degreesintheshadeandthereisnoshade

10) Can’t they give them a few skriks with some spinnekoppe, parktown prawn and snakes? This lot scream and jump at the sight of a cricket. #givethemafewparktownprawns #skriksforalaugh #skriksforniks

11) If a saffa woman was asked “Can I pull you?” the man would probably get a vetklap. #dontchoonme #nawtmybru

12)Facepalm: “Is that a goat?” whilst admiring our National animal on a safari drive. #ermitsaspringbok

“Don’t be ridiculous a rhino is not actually called a rhinoceros, it isn’t a dinosaur!” More facepalm.